Why Not Rather Be Wronged

Philemon 17–19

"So if you consider me a partner, welcome him as you would me. And if he has wronged you in any way, or owes you anything, charge that to my account. I, Paul, write this with my own hand: I will repay it—not to mention to you that you owe me even your very self."

In his letter to Philemon, Paul addresses the wrongs between Philemon and Onesimus. Both men have sinned against each other with the potential of those sins spiraling and standing in the way of their restoration, becoming a potential issue for the church in Collasae.

Paul is most concerned with unity within the church of Collasae. He’s unconcerned about who owes who or making things fair. Paul wants the shortest, most generous, and gracious resolution to the problem - so much so that he offers to pay any debt owed. It's better to be wronged in order to remain unified as God's People.

3 Biblical Principals for Conflict in the Church:

1. Overlooking harm suffered by a brother/sister is better than creating division.

In principle, you should be humble enough to allow wrongdoing to be settled within the context of the local church or else overlook it.

2. Assume a position of sympathy, love, and humility towards wrongdoers.

This settles the issue and stops the cycle of wrongdoing/sin–so that there is healing and peace in the community, which benefits everyone.

3. Virtue reorients the people against the problem.

In the church, there will be conflict. But it's not him against her or this group against that group. It’s the church against the problem. This insight gives us the patience to step back and evaluate the situation, to deal with it in wisdom.